How do I master my feelings (plus poem)

I don’t know about you but I really struggle to master my feelings when emotion is running high. It’s like I lose the ability to act like a normal human being (or at least a normal adult human being).

Have you ever found yourself in a stressful situation and all that you can do is cry? Have you ever wanted to keep your cool and found yourself screaming at the top of your voice? Well, I think we’ve all been there at one point or another and apparently it’s completely normal.

Now, I’m all for showing your vulnerabilities because I believe that it helps to foster good relationships with others. Showing that you’re vulnerable and that you do have feelings makes you more much easier to relate to. However there is such a thing as too much of a good thing.

Don’t become known as the drama queen!

If you’re always kicking off and making a scene you’re going to become really unpopular pretty quickly. We all know that one person who we shrink away from when things go wrong.

So how do you master those emotions and become a little more zen when the proverbial shit has hit the fan? Here are three ways to change your thinking so that you can stay as cool as a cucumber in an emergency:

  1. Learn the art of meditation. It will help you to stay calm especially if you practice it in the morning, before you start your day. There are tonnes of guided meditations on Youtube that you can use for free.
  2. Remember that emotions can’t hurt you. You lash out at people and cry because you are frightened. The little kid in you is just trying to scare off the perceived attack. If you can tell yourself that the feeling won’t hurt you it’s much easier to curb that fear and stay calm, at least on the outside!
  3. Don’t engage with the person who has wound you up. Tit for tat is not going to work if you want to master your feelings. If somebody says something that is hurtful and would normally set you off try saying “Thank you for your input. I will take that on board.” It will totally stump the other person and they won’t really feel like they have made a chink in your armour. It actually becomes quite funny to watch them try and come back from that.

Bonus Poem – Emotions

Sometimes I really do not know

In which direction I should go,

When I’m pinned against the wall,

And this person’s gunning for my fall.

I feel like maybe I should cry,

I cannot fight but also cannot fly.

I’m trapped with no control,

You’re crushing my very heart and soul.

I used to drink to dampen down

The feelings and to place the crown,

Of painful thorns upon my head.

Now it goes without it being said,

That letting feelings flow and ebb,

Will free me from that sticky web,

Of tears and screams and then the losing

Of the words and actions of your choosing.

But those feelings will not hurt you,

So take it down a notch or two.

Don’t fight back or engage

And dissipate your angry rage.

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