I stooped and touched the drooping petals,
I guessed those flowers had been there
For several weeks at least.
Cellophane all cracked and crumpled,
And a greeting card that’s long since disappeared.
I wondered how the person these were for
Had died, had perished, lost their life.
I wondered if they had a spouse or kids,
Or anyone who missed them dearly, now that they were gone.
And then my thoughts, they trailed away,
To my own life and my own pain.
I missed her even though she lived.
But the breaking of those bonds,
Were just as violent and severe.
I missed her with the same intensity
That I would feel if I were taping flowers to this tree.
She’s gone, not dead, but vanished from my life.
Perhaps I need to buy some flowers,
Make a little grave to mark
The passing of a love that’s done.
Then perhaps I’ll find a way to put her ghost to rest
And remove this heavy weight that’s rested on my chest.
I miss my mum so much. She’s not died but she has cut me out of her life completely and I have found that some of the things I say to people make it sound like she is no longer here at all. I’m so sad about everything that has happened that I just want to put it all to rest. But no matter how hard I try, I can’t give up on the hope that I might get her back. I can’t have the ‘funeral’ because there is so much uncertainty. And I love her and would have her back in a heartbeat.
If you are mourning the end of a relationship I hope that you are staying strong and looking after yourself. Just be open and ready if the person does want to reconcile because hatred is a horrible and energy draining emotion.