sleep drunk

The page can sometimes swim

In useless undulating lines

As words snake up and down in waves

Of curlicues that once were full

Of certainty, of blinding reason.

Now I’m just a drunkard with

No liquid fun just heavy lids

And endless hours under sleepless curse.

I wrote my little poem and words yesterday having only slept for three hours in almost three days. I was so exhausted but i was determined to write something.

Anyway, I wrote what I wanted with great difficulty and fell asleep. But as I wrote I had the same feeling that I used to have when I wrote while drunk.

The words were swimming before my eyes and every time I tried to hold onto a sentence, its meaning would somehow slip from my consciousness.

When I woke up I reread what I had written and the final sentence just made no sense at all. My rested brain couldn’t even remember where I was trying to go with the sentence.

It just made me think a lot about my writing when I was drinking and how hard it was to keep my train of thought. And God knows what rubbish I must have said out loud during those years!

Anyway, just wanted to apologise if you were one of the first people reading what I wrote because you may have been left wondering why I had drifted off into gibberish.

And on that note, I think it’s time for bed.

Much Love

Rachel xx

4 thoughts on “sleep drunk

  1. crispina kemp

    Yep, I’ve experienced the same, though my intoxicant wasn’t alcohol but something greener. And I’ve certainly known the effects of sleep deprivation. 13 yrs with CFS; people think cos you’re always tired that you be always sleeping. No, you’re tired cos you can’t sleep. Yea, the words swim, and between the first and last word of a sentence you forget the sense.

      1. crispina kemp

        It might change over the years. I know in my 20s through to 40s I functioned best on 4 to 6 hours. Now I want a full 8, thank you very much.

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