So many little things make me think of you

Even when I know it’s going to cut deep

I’ll get all sentimental in the supermarket shop

And when I pass the shelf of slices filled with cream

I’ll stop and think about the times we’d get home late

From working in the bars, and crawl into our bed

We’d sit and watch the trashy late night shows

Inhaling such indulgent treats, almost unaware

Of crumbs that flaked upon on the sheets

It didn’t matter as I had you by my side, and still

It pains the heart to see those little boxes in the humming fridge

Two slices side by side, waiting to be bought

One for me and one for you.

I do write quite a bit about memories but I do find them so fascinating. I think it’s because they can bubble up so unexpectedly and can initiate such strong emotions.

It was just last night, at work, I was putting out some of our chilled delivery when I was faced with a case of cream slices. As I was putting them into the fridge I was reminded of my ex and I eating them in bed after a hard shift at work.

The shop we bought them from must have been open 24 hours because I seem to remember getting them on the way home after work, well after midnight. But I have vivid memories of sitting on our bed and devouring them while watching TV

I felt in love, safe, content and relieved that another hard shift was over. I don’t think I’ve ever felt like that since, so perhaps that’s why this is so memorable.

Anyway, I didn’t have much more to say about it, other than: aren’t memories strange and wonderful and scary, all at once? I wish that I could understand them on a more scientific level because I find it so interesting.

My heart broke a little bit as I put those desserts on the shelf. But in a good way, because I remembered that I was loved once and I still have a whole lifetime to look forward to where I can eat cream slices with friends and family and lovers. And I guess that’s enough of a reason to stay alive.

Much Love

Rachel xx