to the girl with the swingy ponytail

I watched you at the beach the other day,

You wouldn’t have noticed me, huddled in a coat,

A coat from Oxfam that I’ve owned for several years.

You were jogging in Lulu Lemon’s latest line

And your ponytail was swinging in that healthy way.

I know that you must have a husband, a lawyer,

And you live on an estate with a neighbourhood watch

With book clubs and brunches with mummies

After yoga or pilates or a spin class

That would kill us mere mortals

Who dare to stumble into a KFC.

I’m not bitter, just curious.

I’d like to know what it feels like to be that perfect.

*

Only you’re not what I thought,

I followed you home, it’s creepy I know,

But I saw you crying and drinking at three.

The husband is cheating and the mummies,

Well they’re not very nice.

*

It’s a timely reminder that my life is OK

So I’ll tie up my hair and allow it to swing

In that awfully healthy way.

I have a problem that I’m sure other people suffer with. I am terrible for looking at other people’s lives and fantasising about how wonderful they must be.

The problem is that I don’t know a thing about these people. It’s all a fiction that I have created in my mind to make myself miserable, and I don’t know why I do it.

I also have a tendency to read people’s minds and think that I know exactly what is going on in their heads. I KNOW that they hate me because they gave me a weird look once.

It’s madness and I really need to stop it because I torture myself with these stories. I am learning over time to stop comparing and remembering that everyone has their problems.

We all just need to be kind to one another and be really grateful for the things that we do have.

Much Love

Rachel xx

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