oh to be young again….

people wearing backpacks
Photo by Stanley Morales on Pexels.com

I went back to college today, and watched the students walk

Past my canteen seat, as sunlight filtered in.

They wandered past in groups of rainbow brights

With slogan shirts and torn up tights.

I wish that I could dress with such abandon

But now I’m welded to the rails I ride each day

And all I do is dream of youth again.

As part of my teaching course I go to the local college once a week to receive my central training. It’s a great opportunity to meet up with all of the other trainees and swap stories.

However, we share the campus with the teenagers who are there to do their A levels. For anyone not in the UK, these students are aged 16-18 and are enjoying the freedom of not being at school anymore.

Probably the biggest difference between school and college is that us Brits don’t have to wear uniform for the first time. And after twelve years of wearing a uniform it can be quite liberating to finally be free of it.

I had forgotten about this feeling though, and I was only reminded of it when I saw these students on their first day, as I sat on campus eating my lunch.

The clothes that some of these students were wearing were absolutely outrageous and I couldn’t help but laugh at myself as I remembered that feeling on the first day; the feeling that I needed to wear something that reflected my personality.

I sometimes wish that I could go back to that time, even though it wasn’t all that pleasant for me. But I would love to go back and experience that feeling of needing to set myself apart, and not giving a shit what people thought.

I hope that I get to reinvent myself with my new job. I may not be allowed to dye my hair purple and dress like an umpa lumpa, but I can become a more confident version of myself. I could become kinder and more forgiving. There are so many ways in which I could improve myself and now is the perfect time.

Much Love

Rachel xx

8 thoughts on “oh to be young again….

  1. crispina kemp

    You can reinvent yourself as many times as you need… until you find the one design that’s right for you. I’ve been many things, have dressed in many ways, have (sometimes) conformed, though more often not. Have been outrageous. Have been quiet. And now I’m all mellowed out and productive. And I now have PURPLE hair.

  2. Greg Dennison

    I wish I could go back to that time, when there were all sorts of opportunities in front of me and I was surrounded by people the same age as me at the same place in life as me. Life just seemed easier then… study hard enough and I’ll be successful, and community is built in. I was good at school, and not good at real life. That’s part of the reason why I write about that time in my blog. But I need to be careful and not get wrapped up in that. Those days are gone. Even if I were to move back there, which I’ve thought about many times (I’m not that far away now), I wouldn’t be moving back to 1995.

  3. gulfcoastpoet@gmail.com

    Rachel, I graduated from college at forty. My mother got her nursing certificate at forty-five. My sister became a social worker in her thirties. Some of my classes allowed retired people to audit classes that were not filled. Learning is for a lifetime! Enjoy. <3 Cheryl

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