i poured my heart out into a book

writer working on typewriter in office
Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

I have this dream that one day I’ll be a celebrated author. I’ve written a handful of novels with the aim of getting them published properly, by Penguin or another publishing house that can throw tonnes of cash at it.

I was lucky enough to have a couple of agents want to look at my work, but none of them led anywhere.

It’s so disappointing, when you have poured so much time and love into a piece of work, to have nobody love it in quite the way you do. And a lot of the time, you have written about something that actually means something to you; there’s a little piece of you wrapped up in it.

In the end, I’ve self published and the books just languish at the bottom of the pile on Amazon. I think I’ve made about £35 out of my work so far!

I’ve just, this evening, finished my first little book of poetry and essays and I love it so much that I don’t know if I can bear the rejection that will come with sending it out.

But surely it’s worth a try? Surely there’s someone out there who will cherish a little piece of me? And maybe there’s a handful of readers that could heal and feel solidarity in knowing that we’ve experienced the same pain?

It’s no longer about the money; it’s about getting my words out and knowing that I’ve made someone feel better. It’s the feeling that I can reach out in the dark and say, “I’ve been there too.”

Much Love

Rachel xx

10 thoughts on “i poured my heart out into a book

  1. Greg Dennison

    I’ll read it! I know the feeling, though… sometimes I wonder if anyone cares about my blog as much as I do. But even if one person found something in my story to help them, even if one person learned something about 90s music or the early history of the Internet, then I made a difference.

    1. patientandkindlove

      That’s the perfect way to think about it. And I know that sometimes I’m really guilty of worrying too much about being adored when I should just write because I love it. As you say, it’s more important to have an effect on one person.

  2. Florence Ezekafor

    Do not be discouraged. It’s a good thing you self-published. The next thing is to keep your shop open to buyers by talking about your book just like you’re doing now. Include the link to them in your posts. On social media platforms if possible. Market like crazy. Keep talking about it to let people know about them. Thank your buyers on your blog as a strategy – to get more buyers. Even if it’s one person in a month, appreciate them. You will look back someday to remember how hard it had been, by then, you’re already selling great.
    Another thing , never ever be discouraged by traditional publishers! Keep trying them. One day, they will love to publish your work. Every successful author has had a bad beginning.

    1. patientandkindlove

      Aw thank you! I really need to be more confident when it comes to advertising. I always worry that people will get bored of me or think I’m being annoying. It’s the only way though, and I guess you made a good point: if you show appreciation then people won’t mind! x

      1. Florence Ezekafor

        I think some of us would like to see your book cover and it’s Amazon shop link. Include the link at least twice a week. It will make a little difference. It’s like this, if you don’t talk about it, you don’t get it across to buys.
        Wishing you all the best.❤

  3. crispina kemp

    Writers do not make money. That is the dream. It takes a movie contract to bring in the dollars.
    But if just one person reads your work then you have made a difference and an impact. Do not despair.

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