It starts with images that feel
Wrong to taste, a bitter tang
That hurts the tips of tongues
And then it scratches at the brain
Warning that there’s something wrong
Something less than perfect swims
Through our bodies to our toes
Where muscles curl in fluffy socks
The sign that life is full of hot
And heavy moments meant to be
Private, unseen by our curious eyes.
I’m reading a book called My Dark Vanessa. It’s incredible. I would even go as far as saying it’s one of my favourite novels ever… and I’m only just over a hundred pages in.
The story is about a girl who is fifteen and she falls for her English teacher. However, it is much darker than just a story of a harmless crush; because the teacher encourages it and he is three times her age.
The author goes into real detail as to what the two of them get up to and it makes for a toe curling read.
I just wonder what it is that makes us, as humans, feel this horrid feeling. I just want to cringe, curl up in a ball and close my eyes and ears. I think it might be the fact that it’s something I know is wrong, or something that we shouldn’t be privy to.
I say that it’s a horrible feeling, but yet it becomes compulsive; it’s like an addiction that just needs feeding. Perhaps, it brings up all of the memories of those embarrassing crushes we had on teachers and what would have happened if something would have happened there.
It’s fascinating reading and it’s brought up so many uncomfortable feelings and thoughts; something that I think is sometimes important to feel when we read.
P.S can we also just take a moment to appreciate that cover. It’s just so beautiful that I would love to frame it once it’s read.
6 thoughts on “when you feel a toe curl coming on”
It’s funny, isn’t it, how that feeling is both repulsive and alluring at the same time. We know that sort of relationship is wrong on a lot of levels, and in any case, it’s weird or worse to be privy to someone else’s intimacy. At the same time, we’re drawn to those things, like staring at a car crash. I don’t know why people are like that, but we feel that tug-of-war. That’s why you see people standing around gawping when there’s a building on fire or something.
This is so true. I guess it’s why people watched the Gladiators battle to the death and they flocked to watch executions.
Don’t stand so close, don’t stand so close, don’t stand so close to me….
Red hair is cool. The story might cause us to cringe and also draw us in. The potency of well-drawn fiction, I imagine.
It is so powerful. It’s made me feel sick in places but I think it might be a contender for my favourite book ever. It’s that good!
That’s outstanding. Several years ago, I read a horror story that was so scary I had to put it aside. But I had come to care about the characters and wanted to know what happened to them, and so after a while I retrieved the novel and finished it. Ghost Story by Peter Straub.