You can’t just be born with it,

It has to be earned,

With hours of grind

And those tears you cry now

Are the same that I cried

When I wore your shoes.

I had an observation done on my lesson by my Head of Department and it really didn’t go too well. They are a boisterous class so as soon as she walked in I felt my heart sink.

I have shuffled the seating plan and tried everything in my power to calm them down, to no avail. She came back after the lesson and told me I need to be tougher on them (no surprise there).

However, like any good leader should do, she left me with two suggestions to try and make my life a bit easier. I half rolled my eyes, but I am always willing to learn, so I put them into practice today.

And blow me down, I had the best lesson ever with them.

I finished the lesson convinced that my Head of Department was magic. I was sure that this woman must have some mad gut instinct, but as I reflected on it, I realised that she had something far more precious. Experience.

That stuff is like gold dust and unfortunately it has to be earned over many years. But I was also reminded of the fact that I’ve only been flying solo for a mere six months, so is it fair to beat myself up for not knowing how to fix things?

One day I’ll look back at this time and probably have a little laugh at myself. It would be amazing to have that intuition just magically inside me, but alas, I’ll just have to put up with this agony for another 20+ years.

Much Love

Rachel xx