Take a look at the things you do,
The rings that spread outwards
And ask what effect you have
On the shores of the lake
And how could you change
Yourself for the better
In a selfish world?
I’m struggling with a few students at the moment, because they just don’t seem able to control their behaviour. And I am left wondering if these students have the ability to control their impulses.
When I first got sober, one of the most important steps was to acknowledge that there were issues and that I had to learn to control my behaviour. I could have just continued the way I was because it was easy, but I really wanted a better life and so that involved taking responsibility for my actions.
Some of the children I teach, seem unable to accept that their behaviour is unacceptable and they seem willing to blame everyone and everything else, rather than take a deep look at themselves.
Perhaps they are too young to understand and as they mature, they will learn that it’s not fair on the people around them. But I hope that this does happen because I strongly disagree with giving people an out because they have ADHD or anxiety or whatever other issue they have.
The only way to live a full life is to learn to control those impulses, and sometimes that can be really bloody uncomfortable. But it must be done.
Much Love
Rachel xx
Margot Kinberg
Yes, it can be uncomfortable, Rachel, but you’re right; we need to take responsibility for what we say and do. I think part of it is teaching kids, from an early age, that what they do and say impacts others. Kids can start with something as simple as, ‘When you leave dishes in your room instead of bringing them to the kitchen, we can’t use them for eating.’ They can learn from those little things that everyone impacts everyone else. It’s a tough lesson to learn, but I think it needs to be taught.
patientandkindlove
I couldn’t agree more, but some kids’ home lives are chaotic and they just don’t understand why we have rules in school. It’s infuriating.
Greg Dennison
They probably don’t. I don’t know how different it is over there compared to here, but here a lot of kids aren’t raised to control their impulses at all. Their parents give them whatever they want, immediately, just to shut them up and not have to deal with them. And with stuff like video on demand and buying on credit, we have created a society based on not controlling impulses…
patientandkindlove
It’s exactly the same here. Some parents just want to find the easiest route.