the things she says to me

man and woman kissing
Photo by cottonbro on

You know you’re crap at your job,

You know you look like a fool?

You know that guy is way too hot for you,

And what’s going on with your hair?

That woman looks fat, a bit like a walrus,

You know that you’re awful for thinking it

But you’re the worst human of all of us.

You know that your thoughts are unholy

Even when insults are coming from me,

It’s you that’s the dickhead letting them be.

I guess that everyone has some form of inner monologue that seems to run wild every so often. And I do hope that sometimes their heads say some things that shock even them.

It’s a pretty awful feeling when your inner voice says things that you would never dream of saying to someone’s face, but I’m sure everyone has felt that loss of control and you have no idea where it even came from.

And then when that voice turns on yourself, things can get really messy.

I really want to know why we were designed to have this horrible person rattling around our brains. It’s like we were formed with a faulty setting and I demand a refund or replacement 😁

Much Love

Rachel xx

10 thoughts on “the things she says to me

  1. Margot Kinberg

    Ah, yes, that hypercritical voice. I think we all hear it at times, Rachel. Research I’ve read suggests it sometimes happens when an influential person (parent, teacher, coach, etc.) said those kinds of things. Children tend to take those comments seriously and internalise them. Other research says social media doesn’t do much to help us have better views of ourselves – especially apps like TikTok. I think we have to be as kind in speaking to ourselves as we would want to be when speaking to others.

    1. patientandkindlove

      Absolutely. I once saw a therapist who asked if I would talk to a friend the way I talk to myself and it was a really eye opening moment to realise how awful I can be to myself. It’s a really good test.

  2. clcouch123

    I don’t know that we’re designed or born with this awful inner voice. Maybe more so we’re conditioned to take it on. Which I guess means we could be conditioned out of the voice, though that might require consistent positive remarks and encouragement. Hmm.

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