Sensual shots of fruity chutneys
Boiled and poured in starlit jars
Then pudding sparkling with the fruits
That soaked for months in rum
Feeling giddy on those boozy fumes
That seem to seep through TV screens
As TV chefs will lick their lips
Glossy with the melted goose fat
Crisping spuds like jagged rocks
That pile up in their silver dishes
Calling over pigs in blankets
Cabbage of a crimson red
And verdant sprouts in butter too
The chefs make Christmas seem so smooth
Sexy and a sultry do.
I love watching Christmas cooking programmes. I’m not really into cooking shows ordinarily, but the Christmas ones are something different.
My favourite is always Nigella. For those of you that don’t know who she is, she is a cook rather than a chef. And she is famous for being quite sexy with her cooking. Her descriptions of the food alone, are enough to turn most people on.
Her Christmas shows, and the ones other chefs make at this time of year, are always so magical. There are always twinkling lights and a houseful of happy friends enjoying the canapes she has made.
It’s what we always imagine and hope for Christmas to be – even if it very rarely is that way.