Tick tick tick,
All those boxes that make
You the perfect match for me.
You’re a chiseled god
And my boxes suggest
You should be here with me.
Sorry, but I’ve been hooked back into the winter season of Love Island and one of the things I love most about the show is the overuse of all the cliches.
And the best one is ‘you’re ticking all my boxes’.
I say it’s the best one, but actually it’s a bloody awful line because it is just reducing people to a checklist. If somebody told me I had ticked all their boxes I would be really concerned about what it is they are actually looking for in a partner.
And the funniest thing (or saddest, depending on how you look at it) is that all of the boxes seem to be related to looks. All these Love Island people care about is that you have lovely eyes. I have never heard one of them ever say that they are looking for kindness or an interest in Victorian literature.
I think the fact that this annoys me so much is a sure sign that I’m officially old.