Her heart is racing, a fluttering

Like a humming bird thumping

Against the brittle bones, a cage

And she feels like she’s trapped inside.

The whiteness of her dress is blinding

And tightening slowly, as she wonders

Should she make her way to the flowery aisle,

Or should she turn and run?

She’s been thinking about it for months now,

When everyone says how excited she should be.

But instead, it’s just a panic scraping at her brain,

Warning her in an angry red

That she shouldn’t go ahead.

I wonder how many people change their mind about getting married on the day of their wedding? There must be quite a few, as shocking as it sounds. I mean, it’s such a huge step to take and there must be lots of people who feel that they just can’t get through with it, even though they have been swept along in the excitement for far too long.

I’ve never organized a proper wedding, but I can imagine that it’s quite exciting to pick out the flowers and the cake, and to go and try on dresses. And it’s probably really difficult to say no when you get asked.

In short, as soon as the question is asked of you, it becomes really tricky to reverse any decisions, and if you’re a people pleaser it must be really easy to get dragged along for months, feeling utterly miserable.

I could imagine myself doing just that, and then having to get my trainers on and running very quickly, away from the church. But then I am a bit of a flake, so I do feel that you would be taking a risk if you ever thought it was a good idea to propose to me.

Much Love

Rachel xx