when you realise you’ll actually miss them

There’ll always be the ones you hate,

That physical hate that eats at you

And kills you quietly, as you plot

How you could kill them.

And then one day, when it’s coming to the end

It somehow starts to fade

And you realise that they’ve earned

A special place in your stone cold heart.

I actually hate my Year 11 class. I don’t have the skills and strategies to deal with their behaviour, and so I end up feeling a bit sick every time they come to my room. My heart sinks and I know that I have 45 minutes of hell to get through.

But we are approaching their exams and that means that they’ll be leaving in the next five or six weeks. And I’ve suddenly started to feel a little ache in my heart every time I think about that.

Blow me down, can you believe that the people I’ve hated with a passion, have managed to worm their way in and make me feel something?

Is this a normal thing to happen? Does it happen with other people like colleagues? Or exes? I tell you that if I shed a tear on their final day I’ll feel like I’ve totally lost the plot.

Much Love

Rachel xx

3 thoughts on “when you realise you’ll actually miss them

  1. Margot Kinberg

    It is, I think, a normal thing to happen, Rachel. They may make you barkers, but you’ve gotten to know them. You’ve shared experiences. Of course you’ll miss some things about them. To me, anyway, it’s a bit like ending a relationship that you know needs to end. You know it’s over, and most of you is glad, but there are things you loved about that person…

  2. clcouch123

    Good questions. I taught at a school famous for not telling new teachers it gathered all the problem students let go from other schools. I had a ninth-grade class I couldn’t stand and still don’t. But the other classes? They were incorrigible, and I miss them.

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