the male suicide issue
I’m just watching a documentary that Roman Kemp made about male suicide. His best friend killed himself and he has suffered
Read More...The kindest corner of the interweb
I’m just watching a documentary that Roman Kemp made about male suicide. His best friend killed himself and he has suffered
Read More...The automatic doors slide open
And the waft of swimming pool arrives
The metallic sound of splashing legs
As children push across their kickboard floats
The wall of blue that meets the eye
Soothes the ragged soul
This is a church of sorts
A place to hold my body in mid flight
A hit of power coursing through the veins
As one slides into a muffled world
Below the surface you can’t hurt me
I’m in a daydream world.
The slightly podgy boy
With glasses, lenses thicker than
The bottom of glass bottles,
Feet turned in
And trainers bought
From the nearest discount store,
But when the gun is fired
Like a shot he’s off,
Surprising crowds who cry
With happy tears, hoping for
A golden moment of their own.
It was the final of Strictly Come Dancing tonight. Over in the US you’ll know it as Dancing With The Stars. I think that everywhere it’s aired, it’s universally loved.
Hamza won the show and I don’t think anyone would have guessed that would be the case at the beginning of the season.
He improved so much and it was amazing to watch his dances this evening. He didn’t even start with a huge fan base so he had won people over on his actual dancing talent and his lovely personality.
I think we all love an underdog because it gives us some hope that we can also have a moment in the sun.
Well done Hamza and Jowita.
Much Love
Rachel xx
I got into a bit of trouble at work today and it’s made me really sad. On the one hand, I’m upset because I feel like I’ve let myself down in some way, and on the other hand, I’m even more sad that I got my hand slapped for something so innocent.
I have an Instagram account that I show all my art work on and it’s lots of portraits and landscapes. I’d quite innocently let some of my students know my account details.
I find it horrible that we’re not to do this because of safeguarding. Of course, I blocked those students and changed my account name when I was told it was an issue, but that is sad that we have to worry about something like this.
There must be some terrible people out there for us to have all come to this point. I was totally naive and I think I don’t always appreciate what horrible things go on out there in the world… and I’m glad I don’t to tell you the truth.
Much Love
Rachel xx
We wipe away their tears
When they have got themselves worked up,
We prod them when they’re feeling way too lazy
To do the work that’ll get them through those tests,
You know, the GCSEs they need but seem to not
Remember that they’re coming up.
We mark their books till 10pm
Then start our emails way before the sun comes up.
Sure we get those long weeks off
But do you really want a try?
It’s National Teacher’s Day so I thought I’d write a little something to tell the haters what it is we actually do.
I feel like a teacher, a mum, a medic and a therapist most days and we all take it on with so much enthusiasm. I see a lot of teacher bashing on social media, but being in school you would see that 99.9% of teachers go above and beyond and want to see all kids succeeding.
So, take a bow teachers. You deserve those bloody long holidays.
Much Love
Rachel xx
The air crackles, thick
With the smell of chargrilled burgers
As children scream, sprinklers
Chasing them around back gardens,
Knowing there’s no school tomorrow,
Just an endless run of days
Each kissed by sun aggressively,
It burns with such ferocious force
That only mad dogs and those Englishmen
Will play on fields no longer green
But scorched an ugly brown
The only respite found is underneath
Those weeping willows, casting shade
As little toes splash in the shallows
Wishing that they could wade deeper in
Escaping heat that quickly eats us whole.
I know it sounds cliche
But get back up,
It might not even be
The third time a charm,
It could be the fourth
Or even the fifth
But however long it takes
The reward is the sweetest.
I love to run. I’m not a talented runner, but I do love to push myself as hard as I can and I love to see just how far I can go. And so it seemed only natural that I gravitated towards the ultra marathon distance, finally making it up to the 100 milers.
I did five of them between 2015 and 2017 and then I hit a bit of a road block. I don’t understand why, but every time I attempted the race, my head just gave up anywhere between 60 and eighty miles.
I had three failed attempts under my belt and a five year dry spell and I really was starting to think that I just didn’t have the ability to do it anymore.
So, I was a little bit hesitant when I entered a hundred miler for the weekend just gone. But, nevertheless, I pulled on my trainers and hit the trail. And I poured my little heart into it.
And you know what? I only went and bloody did it.
So, I just wanted to say that when you’ve failed at something a few times, it never means that it’s over. If you want something bad enough, you can get it. Just keep plodding away and eventually you will get there.
Much Love,
Rachel xx
She slides through bodies slick with sweat
A beer in hand and a shot glass waiting on the bar,
She knows the burning drink will curdle with the pills
She swallowed in the hope to drown the week,
The nagging boss and the dishes still piled high at home.
The bass notes shake her bones, her heart
And as the drugs take hold, the lights flash bright,
Lasers scan her body, making her feel guilty,
Ashamed of what she’s plied her body with
And in the toilets, splashing water on her face
She longs for bed, to hide that face
Staring out from a neon mirror, mascara running
Lipstick smeared and a girl vomiting in the filthy stall.
No, she says. It’s time for home, to take off heels
And find some comfort in a better place.
I see your words, blinking
On the computer screen
At this late night hour
When sleep evades and causes
Desperation but
Your words are just enough
To make me smile – no, laugh.
I try to stay away from social media as much as possible as it has the tendency to bring out all the worst qualities in me. It piques my jealousy and my anger and in normal life that is just not me.
However, when I do jump on there and have a little rifle though the comments sections, I do occasionally find a comment that has the ability to make me snort so that my coffee almost comes out of my nose.
And when I come across these comments, I can’t help but wonder who these people are that wrote such great material. And where do they live? And can they be friends with me?
After the Easter address this picture was posted and Twitter and the person who put it up just wrote ‘this only happens when a Pope is in distress’. I found it hilarious. That might say more about me than the person who wrote it.
Much Love
Rachel xx