learning to like myself a bit more
a little pep talk for those who are struggling
Swallowing pills and chasing with wine As tears river down onto cold puffy pillows You know it’s the end, you want it that way. But don’t take that darkest of terrible steps Because somewhere out there is a soul who will miss Your sweetest of smiles and your voice in their ear. You may not…
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when you realise that they pity you a bit
Those eyes that bore into your soul As you spill the things that haunt your mind Day by day by day. To me, it’s something rather normal to Hear I’m not quite worth the air I breathe, But when I breathe those words out loud They shock the world that hears them said. I had…
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stepping in their footsteps
I’m very excited this weekend, as I’m running my first school trip on Monday and we are going to The Globe Theatre in London.
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it’s so great that these kids get to talk
The bubbles start so small and insignificant, Inconsequential, like stars in galaxies Far too far away for me to worry on. But soon they build and then it’s like An atom bomb that tears through streets, Ripping life from hopeful hearts. So talk, my friends, and let it all out Just try not to worry…
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i watched father of the bride 2 for the second time in a month, so something’s definitely wrong
The nervous lump of heavy stone That presses down inside, taking breath away. And sometimes only movies from the past Can soothe the breathless anxiousness That clamours at my throat. That nostalgic script and play Will always see those heavy blues away. I don’t know about you, but sometimes the only way to get myself…
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last chance saloon
There’s nothing for another hundred miles or so And we will cling to social life With such ferocious hope and faith, A wish that it will swing again Into view, to fill our lives with Christmas joy, But we cannot be sure of this, We make the most of what we have As doors will…
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four years of sobriety
There was a time when twenty-four hours was too much, When the sweet taste of chardonnay made life worth living And the guilt and shame that always followed Was a price I was sadly willing to pay. Today I celebrate four years of sobriety. I’m lucky that I never got to the point where I…
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how are you coping…..really?
I felt those familiar pangs last night, As the news filtered through And the words rattled round On a Twitter fed carousel Built just to torture The sensitive ones, Like you and me. I sat watching the TV last night and I felt that blind panic that I remember feeling at the end of March.…
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i really need a bottle of love
A bottle with a screw top, preferably, So that I can take a sip and stow away the rest. Just so I won’t have to take Doses that I’d never handle in a million years, A little here and there to stem the flow Of hate that courses through my life, But not enough to…
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today i boiled 62 kettles and now i feel like a monster
Attenborough’s warned us, time and time again, About the ice caps melting into seas And animals are vanishing with terrifying ease. But am I doing anything to help? Or am I just a drain on oil and air? Or am I just too worried for A future I can’t help or change? I was told…
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when friends just seem to fall away
They’re always still there, Lurking away in shadowy coves, Appearing in photos With arms flung round shoulders, Smiles all abound. And you wonder how so You weren’t invited, Do they hate you so much? I have friends from school that I don’t speak to anymore. Not out of choice. I would love to hang out…
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when someone says something nice
I remember when I was in Year 9, so I was probably about fourteen, and this teacher asked me to write a story. I poured my heart and soul into it and handed it in, hoping that the teacher would love it as much as I did. Even then, my writing was like a child…
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roast chicken on revolutionary road
She stands in 50’s clothes With one roast chicken, whole, Balanced in her hands, Her head just tilted to one side, Questioning the look I have Plastered on my face. It’s far from natural, this change in mood, From dark and cloudy To a perfect housewife with A beaming perma-smile. I just watched Revolutionary Road…
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when you realise you’re not alone
Sitting in boxes, in absent quiet, Waiting for time to slip away, We spark up nothing, and panic and fret. We think we’re alone, but there are others out there, In their own little boxes, filling with stress. We are so far from lonely, if only we reach Hands out to others and admit to…
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when your brain is a little bit guffed
Tired, so bloody tired That my words a nonsensical So I just stay quiet. Better to say nothing Than have them think bad And misunderstand The wordy soup That clogs up my throat. I’m on a bit of a roller coaster this academic year and everyone warned me that it would happen. I’m happy but…
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when you feel like a failure but your hands are tied
The cable ties are much too tight, The ones that bind my wrists as one And force my frame to stoop and frown. I want to stay upbeat and high But circumstance will always play A role in how I feel about my life. So, I’m going to bang on about my dental problems again,…
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